| Most of us have
conscious and unconscious ideas about what relationship
is supposed to be. While we may agree with our partners
on what we want, at the onset, the path to getting there
often reveals differences and obstacles we didn’t
see in the beginning. Our attitudes and approaches to
relationship are influenced by our unique histories and
views of the world. When we join together we must find
ways to flex and incorporate the views of the other, learning
to co-create a shared vision.
Sometimes relationships push us
to confront ourselves in ways we might not on our own.
Relationships involve learning to be aware of and tolerant
of our own and others feelings, and to live with the
inevitability of conflict and not turn away. We must
be able to hold each other in mind while maintaining
our sense of self.
Therapy can be a place to safely
and respectfully express thoughts, feelings, needs and
wants with your partner, with the support of a therapist
present. A therapist can help couples get to the issues
underlying circular arguments and unproductive habits
of relating.
Therapy can be helpful for couples
feeling stuck, stagnant or distant, for couples taking
on a new chapter in their lives (marriage, parenting,
adopting, caring for aging parents), for couples working
through the pain of an affair, major loss, etc. In our
work together I will help you listen to and hear each
other more effectively, help to identify what gets in
the way of effective communication, empathy and intimacy,
and develop strategies and tools unique to your relationship
that will help you to achieve your relationship goals.
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